A breakup from a genuine romance, simply just...hurts!!
This love writer & author can relate to what you're going through. That last breakup was probably GALACTIC in its intensity!! Most people who've desired to find romance have suffered pains that are unspeakable. Breakups happen! It is a part of life that's as common as forgetting where you put your cell phone sometimes, and walking away from it-not realizing that you'll forget where you put it within the next 10 minutes. That happens to me less often now, thankfully. It never feels good to split with someone you once saw as "special," "worth your while," or "the one." I know this all too well!!!
One question that should be asked shortly after a definite breakup is...
WHAT SHOULD BE DONE?
Begin repairing by loving on you! You've got to get back to what you knew made you happy. It's not guaranteed but at times likely, that you adjusted pieces of who you were to satisfy your partner. Honestly when you think about it, THAT IS NOT OK! Not one part of you should have to melt pieces of who you are, to make room to fit someone else. Men and women naturally compliment one another (at least they're supposed to), and so you having to change parts of you for another person already speaks volumes. Was that a romance that should've even begun in the first place? Put it this way, if you fold a brand new paperback book, and roll it up to fill a particular hole in a wall, you will (1) begin to deform the book itself, and (2) accelerate the wear and tear on the book. Go out on solo dates....! *looks at self* I don't particularly see it as dating myself, because...it'll just be me hanging out n getting food. In my head, going on a romantic date requires two people learning one another. I'll learn myself without calling it a date. Y'all can have fun with that terminology.
Continue repair by occupying your time. Being idle is one of the worst things to do after a breakup situation. The mind loves to replay the good times whenever the conclusion of a love story occurs. Sitting in a pitch black room and allowing your mind to roam free post breakup, is without question one of the WORST decisions a man or woman can make!! Sitting alone in silence and wallowing in sadness is one of the quickest to end up in a straight jacket, or be seen on the 5 or 6 o'clock news for something you may regret while in handcuffs. PLEASE consider staying busy. Read our magazines (you really are missing out if you don't), color in an (actual) adult coloring book, learn to draw or paint, exercise, or something else that is considered constructive. As you occupy your time, you're likely to find yourself learning more about who you are. It's beautiful to see the growth as you keep yourself busy.
Deal with what it is you feel, but not by yourself! You know those people who you trust? YOU definitely need to utilize their care for you now. Vent........vent........vent! The whole "I'm a soldier my g, I got this" will eventually break. After that crumbles into dust, your emotional stronghold and psychological foundation will be at the mercy of your unpacked thoughts. Nothing will ensure your safety if you don't deal with what you feel!!
I'm rooting for you! That last break up isn't the end of the world! You're still breathing, so there's still an opportunity for a better man or woman to find you!!
This gentleman is always rooting for you! You go on ahead, and be the blessed version of yourself!
- Mr Wright